Kolkata doctor rape-murder | What are we teaching our children?

As India mourns the rape and murder of a doctor in Kolkata, author Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni calls for change in societal norms to empower women and protect their rights.

The nation is reeling — and rightly so — in the wake of the horrific rape and murder of a female doctor trainee at R.G. Kar Medical College in Kolkata, now known as the Abhaya case. The crime took place on August 9, just a week before India’s 78th Independence Day — to achieve which, many women had fought heroically. It occurred 10 days before the festival of Raksha Bandhan, when brothers vow to protect their sisters, and a few weeks before Navaratri/Durga Puja, among the country’s most important religious festivals worshipping the divine feminine.

This incident, which has sparked massive protests and candlelight vigils across India and even abroad, would be terrible and shameful anywhere in the world, but it is particularly painful in a country where there is a centuries-old tradition of immortalising the power of women. Our epics, histories and religious texts provide ample proof of this. This is the country where Draupadi took men — including her husbands, elders and even the king — severely to task for not preventing her shameful disrobing in open court. The land where Sita refused to undergo an unfair ‘Agni Pariksha’ (trial by fire) in Ayodhya to prove her chastity; where Rani Laxmi Bai, Matangini Hazra and Kasturba died resisting the British — on the battlefield, in freedom marches, and in jail. Where even now in thousands of homes and temples, the Devi Mahatmya (also known as Chandi or Saptashati) is chanted every day. And where even the curmudgeonly Manu, author of the infamous Manusmriti, asserts: “Where women are honoured, there the gods are pleased.”

But can the gods be pleased with the condition of India today, where, since the 2012 Nirbhaya case in Delhi, reported rape numbers have increased despite stricter laws? In 2012, according to Statista, reported rape cases were less than 25,000. In 2022, a decade later, the number exceeded 31,000. If to this we add other crimes committed against women, such as trafficking, acid throwing and murder, the annual numbers swell to almost 450,000 (National Crime Records Bureau). And only the gods know how many cases remain unreported.

While we wait for more news from the ongoing investigation, appropriate punishment for the criminals, and tougher legislation, including laws on workplace safety, is there something we can do?

Yes. Not ‘can’ but ‘must’. Because though laws and their enforcement are crucial, they are clearly not enough. We must focus on appropriately educating our women — and more so, our men.

For decades, we’ve trained our girls and young women supremely well — but in all the wrong ways. Haven’t we taught them to wear the “right” clothes, avoid “dangerous” places, and be quiet, in case they say something that might spark anger or violence? Haven’t we told them to get home before dark, avoid mixed company, and if travelling in a cab, be sure to call a relative (preferably male) and stay on the phone with him until they reach home?

But now we need to teach them different things: to fight for their dreams, to stand up for themselves, report misconduct, reject victim-shaming, reclaim the night.