There's A Name For That Post-Honeymoon Period In Your Relationship Where All You Do Is Fight

'The couples who struggle most are usually the ones who think love should be easy.'

At their best, romantic relationships are joyous and fulfilling, a safe place to land, a partnership through the good and bad. Getting to that point, though, takes two people willing to confront their unhealthy patterns, unspoken expectations and communication shortcomings… All of this is to be expected, except a lot of us still don’t expect it because we hardly ever get to see the difficulties of relationships reflected back to us (either due to the glossy narratives in popular media or the stigma around discussing them IRL with our friends and families).

If we never see the messy middle, it’s no wonder so many of us freak out when the honeymoon phase ends in a relationship and it feels like all we do is fight, or feel distraught when icky feelings like disappointment or resentment pop up.

But you can stay calm, because the period that comes after the all-consuming infatuation of the honeymoon phase is commonly known as the “power struggle” phase — and it basically happens in every romantic relationship (albeit to varying degrees).

What is the ‘power struggle’ phase in relationships?

Because few people outside of relationship therapy circles have heard about the power struggle phase, let’s define it.