"Everyone wants to feel safer": northeastern Ontarians turn to social media groups to vet online dates
CBC
People will tell you it's a tough world out there when it comes to internet dating. And now, some are taking steps to be more sure of their matches.
Some people in northeastern Ontario are increasingly using social media groups to help vet and verify potential suitors and dates when using online dating apps.
Victoria Kannen, a sociology professor at Cambrian College, says these groups help people feel more secure and empowered when dating online.
"Everyone wants to feel safer and more comfortable when starting a new relationship. Having even a simple reference, like 'I had a good experience with this person,' can be very reassuring," says Kannen.
Abby Brunet, a member of one of these groups, notes that the small pool of single people in northern Ontario often leads to complications in online dating.
"A lot of the guys are talking to the same girls. A friend of mine, who's been married for years and she found out that he was online, dating a bunch of women. She discovered it because of the group chat. That's how she found out and it was just heartbreaking for her," Brunet said.
Cavin Hayer, who has experienced online dating challenges, finds it difficult to trust people based solely on their online profiles.
"If you get ghosted and [experience] a lack of participation in these conversations, you start to build up a fence and you wonder, can you trust anyone on these apps at least until you've met them in person? said Hayer.
Kannen highlights another issue– misrepresentation online. She says social media groups can help users verify the authenticity of their matches.
"Kind of in the same way that we get references when we show up to a job, right? People ask for your references when we go to a restaurant. We look at reviews online. I actually think that that's a very normal thing in life now," said Kannen.
Ashley Rancourt is a member of an online group, and believes they can also help identify potentially unsafe situations.
"There are a lot of women out there who are trying to help other women, especially when it comes to certain individuals who are a little bit more dangerous, said Rancourt.
Hayer suggests there could be different methods for identifying potentially dangerous people.
"It should just be like a public service that the city could provide, even just a list of individuals who have charges or convictions," Hayer explained.
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