
This 1 Big Concern About Raising Boys Didn't Really Exist 30 Years Ago
HuffPost
Parents who raised kids in the '90s are "surprised by how young boys are when they first encounter it," one mom said.
The words “incels,” “alpha” and “manosphere” never crossed Abby Eckel’s mind when she was pregnant with her two sons. Now that the boys are 8 and 10 ― on the cusp of their teenage years ― keeping them away from the manosphere is sometimes all she and her husband can think about.
“It’s literally the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, because I have to be, I feel like, ready 24/7,” Eckel, an online content creator, told HuffPost. “I have to remain vigilant every moment I’m around my sons.”
The manosphere ― a dark rabbit hole where YouTubers and bro podcasters mask their misogyny in self-help, fitness tips and “pickup artist”-style dating advice ― offers young men a sense of community and purpose. The message that women are lesser beings and that you’re being denied your rights to sex or a relationship is particularly potent for boys who feel ignored by mainstream society.
Eckel and her husband monitor the boys’ online activity. They keep the lines of communication open and try to steer them toward healthier models of masculinity. But there’s little they can do to stop the influence of other boys who’ve been radicalized online.
“The hardest thing is that the largest influence is not parents, it’s their friends,” she said. “We’re trying to raise them to be leaders and empathetic, but then they walk out of this house, and society is working overtime to undo that.”













