Does anyone still want kids? Families are shrinking as people have fewer children — or none at all

Demographers, sociologists and your mother-in-law want to know: why aren't people having as many kids? 

Canada recorded its lowest-ever fertility rate for the second year in a row in 2023, according to Statistics Canada, at 1.26 children born per woman. It now joins the ranks of "lowest-low" fertility countries, including South Korea, Spain, Italy and Japan.

Statistics Canada said the drop between 2022 and 2023 specifically reflects an increase in the number of women of childbearing age, but also noted the fertility rate has been steadily declining for more than 15 years. 

Experts have linked a range of factors with reproductive decision-making, including the rising cost of living and eco-anxiety. 

More people are also delaying parenthood until later in life, which can shorten their reproductive window.

But there's also a significant cultural aspect — larger families with multiple children are simply no longer the ideal like they were a few generations ago, said Lisa Strohschein, a sociology professor at the University of Alberta and the editor-in-chief of the journal Canadian Studies in Population. 

We've shifted from a society that had children to help ensure the survival of the household, to one where people choose to become parents out of a desire for personal fulfilment. And "you don't need lots and lots of kids to derive meaning out of life," Strohschein said.

That's reflected in a number of parenting platforms dedicated to those raising only children, like the "One and Done" subreddit with 72,000 members, or the 21,500 videos posted with the #OneAndDone hashtag on TikTok.

There are also influencers like Jen Dalton of Sudbury, Ont., whose @oneanddoneparenting account on Instagram has 55,500 followers.

"No longer do sleepless nights and postpartum anxiety and depression plague me. I do have time to focus on myself, while also focusing on my daughter and my marriage," Dalton wrote in a post in May.

"We have a beautiful balance in our lives."

The recognition that having children is increasingly costly, time-consuming and stressful was reflected in a recent public health advisory issued by the U.S. surgeon general. In August, Vivek Murthy warned about the impact of modern stresses on parents' mental health, saying today's parents face unique challenges.

"Parents across all backgrounds want to provide their kids with a foundation for happiness and success. Yet too many fear they won't be able to provide what's necessary or their kids won't be able to access what they need in order to lead a fulfilling life," Murthy said in the report.

On top of that, some experts have argued that parenting has become more intense. Data shows parents today spend more time with their children than in previous generations (even while more women are working full-time), and the predominant modern parenting style centres on acknowledging a child's feelings — which has left many parents feeling burned out.