As RCMP raise the alarm on sextortion, parents navigate difficult conversations

Early in 2023, the RCMP criminal intelligence division noticed a spike in online sexual extortion reports in New Brunswick. 

Digging into the numbers, Maegan White, an RCMP analyst, saw the increase in reports mostly came from victims who were under 22 and male. This rang alarm bells.

"Immediately, we knew that we had to report this one up to senior management because it is a particular crime type that is impacting vulnerable populations," she said.

Exactly why reports of sextortion from teenage boys and young men are increasing is still unknown. And with the perpetrators being likely linked to international organized crime groups, it's a complicated crime to investigate.

So Cpl. Holly Erb, the New Brunswick RCMP sexual violence unit co-ordinator, says the best way to prevent these crimes is to increase awareness and decrease the shame and stigma, and for parents to talk to their kids about it earlier.

Erb has been working with victims of sexual crimes for almost a decade. She says something needs to change to reduce the number of young victims of sextortion.

"Changes I'd like to see are more conversations with children at a younger age about online safety, consent and sexuality," she said in a CBC News exclusive interview.

"I know that that can be a controversial topic for many parents. However, they are exposed to this type of content more and more frequently at a younger age, and I think it's integral that for the safety of our children and the well-being of our communities that we start having those conversations earlier."

What "earlier" means would depend on the family and the dynamic, but she said the instinct to leave the conversation until the child is 16 or older may not protect them from this type of harm.

"You can have age appropriate conversations as young as the child can understand that you're talking to them," she said. 

These difficult conversations about consent and online safety are not likely to sound the same in every household. Erb said the key is to not think of this issue being addressed in a one-time conversation.

"It's a recurrent conversation that needs to start early and it needs to be repetitive. It needs to be an open conversation,  so children can come and feel comfortable with their parents or a safe adult to have those discussions in case something does happen that makes them feel uncomfortable or uneasy. And then they can always navigate that with someone who's safe."

Crime analyst White said the New Brunswick RCMP receive about one report of online sexual extortion every day. From January to May this year, RCMP had about 130 sextortion reports. Approximately 30 per cent involve a victim who is under 18 years old, White said, and the majority of those are male.

But Erb said this shows only the sextortion attempts that were reported, and there's a good chance many such incidents aren't taken to police.