In India, I was dragged and sucked into fixing world: Lou Vincent recalls fall from grace

Former New Zealand cricketer Lou Vincent shares his journey from depression to match-fixing and redemption in cricket.

Former New Zealand batter Lou Vincent has opened up on how he was drawn to the world of match-fixing during his time at the now defunct Indian Cricket League in the late 2000s, saying being part of a gang at that time gave him a sense of belonging as he battled depression.

Vincent, who represented New Zealand in 23 Tests and 108 ODI, was handed 11 life bans by the England and Wales Cricket Board in 2014 for match-fixing. Last year, the ban was revised allowing him to be involved in domestic cricket.

The 46-year-old had started his career with a Test hundred on debut against the mighty Australian side of 2000s. As he fought depression and got involved in match-fixing, his promising international career came to a premature end at the age of 29.

In an interview with the The Telegraph' Vincent narrated how his early upbringing impacted his personality and career.

"So I didn't have the mental package to be a professional sports player. So at 28 I was deeply in depression and then went to India, and was dragged, sucked into that fixing world. It was pretty easy to see how it happened," a candid Vincent admitted.

"I felt like I was part of a gang. It almost made me feel better, because I am thinking: 'I am part of a match-fixing gang, I am with a group that's going to have my back and nobody knows our little secret.' "I think that's how most bike gangs work with young kids. Yeah, they sort of groom young kids into 'we'll look after you but go drive that car through the shop and smash it up'." Having grown up in a dysfunctional family, Vincent was always looking for emotional support around him and he ended up finding that in the murky world of corruption. He is currently involved in the anti-corruption education initiatives of New Zealand players' body.

"I literally raised myself from the age of 12, so I was always quite malleable to people around me. Because I wanted to be loved, you're easily led astray," he conceded.