'Blue wall of silence' protects police officers accused of gender-based violence, victims say

WARNING: This article contains graphic content and may affect those who have experienced​ ​​​sexual violence or know someone affected by it.

She was a sergeant and he was a constable. They met at work and became a power couple, sporting matching police badges. 

But their love story would end in violence. It didn't matter that she outranked him — what happened flipped their power balance.

"It was just a slow burn downhill into what became a serious situation of coercive control, which I didn't see that clearly at the time," she said. 

It began with verbal insults, but the woman said her ex-husband became increasingly controlling. He even used a listening device to spy on her, according to court files.

It all came to a head one night in July 2019.

"There was an explosive confrontation," she said. "[He was] chasing me and the kids around the house and we barricaded ourselves in the bedroom and he broke in and my son was trying to defend me. It was such a scene." 

She called her boss, then escaped the house.

"I went to my own police headquarters in my pyjama shirt," she said. 

The police were concerned her husband might be armed, so they dispatched a tactical unit. 

"My kids saw their dad get arrested," said the sergeant, who CBC News has agreed not to name to protect her safety. "I had to stay in the domestic violence office until they could execute a search warrant because they couldn't find his gun. It wasn't where it was supposed to be at work."

Her then husband was locked up in jail while officers searched the couple's home. Police eventually charged him with intercepting private communications, assault, extortion and careless storage of a firearm.

The officer from the Greater Toronto Area (GTA) was suspended with pay. He would go on to stay home for 646 days, collecting almost $300,000 in salary before he finally resigned in 2021. 

Throughout the ordeal, his ex-wife said she was the one treated as the outcast.